Smart little devil...

It is late and I'm up on a Friday night. I hear my garbage can outside. It sounds like it is rocking or something is in there knocking. I know what it is, that damn raccoon!! So I go outside armed with my broom and my ammonia and I see a little black hand pull down the lid on the can slowly. It creeped me out so I just left him to his eating. What am I going to do? Open the can so he can hop out and maul my face? I don't think so people!!! I may be from alabama but I'm not inbred. Besides, this coon is not afraid of me what so ever. One night he crept right up to me while I was sitting on my front porch smoking a cig. Out of no where! He realized I was a human then just casually and slowly turned around and walked back to the woods.
I think I'm going to name him Jo after my neighbor that USED TO like to put his trash in my can so that I could walk it a mile down the drive way for him when he lives ten feet from the curb. He's a jerk that now knows not to mess with me. The last time he put trash in my little trash can Jo the Coon dumped and strolled all of the neighbors trash that was in my can in my yard. The end result was not only a dirty yard but one pissed off lady. I had to clean it up in which I dumped it over in his yard and a stern warning to his roomy. They've not done it since. If he tried it again I told him I'd dump mine and his on his front porch. I'm not his fucking trash keeper. That asshole.
Okay Jo-coon you can eat my trash as long as it isn't left in my yard afterwards. You stay a neat eater in the big can and you can keep eating my trash. Leave the little can alone. It makes a mess.
Okay enough rant time for Lesley to go to bed. ;-)